I did decide to ditch my preconceptions before actually tasting it. I peeled back the lid, took a smell (realised that hayfever had done for this sense) and spread some thickly on some white toast.
At first bite I could taste no cheese, just the chocolate and I thought it’s just chocolate spread but easier to spread, fair play. Then came the aftertaste. It took a full 10 minutes to realise where the familiarity came from. It’s the really cheap chocolate that you get from advent calendars from the pound store. Why oh why would Cadbury put their name to such ridiculously substandard chocolate? Or Philadelphia for that matter? Did they think no one would notice?! If you’re going to manufacture something so clearly leftfield, at least have the decency to make it with proper ingredients!I visited the website for serving suggestions and it’s clear that the Marketing team have no idea how to position it either. Chocolate cheesecake for the incredibly lazy was the obvious choice, a topping for cupcakes less so (I won't mention what I think they actually look like they're topped with, you can draw your own conclusions!). Other than that all instructions seem to be smear it on anything you can find and hope for the best. At 86 calories for a measly 30g I wouldn't go too heavy either.
As an aside, my friends and I often play the game “what food doesn’t go with cheese?” – there are very few, most originating in oriental cuisine, but I think I can safely say that Cadbury chocolate is one of them!
Cheese Score: 1 – for originality. And that is being kind!